Avoiding the inevitable

I HAVE to take new pics today. AAAARRRRGGGHHHHH! Waaaaaaaaaa I don't wanna!! Cant I just know I'm fat and not have to prove it?? I've been to the pool like 3 times and it was so traumatizing. Horrifying. So tomorrow is the day. Today is the pictures. One of the drawbacks of being BFL experienced is that I know what I am in for as far as tiredness, soreness, crabbiness, etc. and I think it takes the edge off of my excitement about transforming my body. Because I know what it is going to take to transform my body. One thing I have working for me this go-round is that Mark works nights, and that means if I want to go to bed at 9 pm (or earlier if I get the kids down)There is no stopping me. And I will be spared the ridicule and accusations that I'm "geriatric" because I'm exhausted at 7 pm. Which is odd becuase when I eat crap I am exhausted allll daaaay. Then I read through old posts and logs of times when I was really on it and on a roll and remember so vividly how great I felt and how much control I had over my life. It was great. I am looking forward to getting to that stage again.

One approach that I am taking this time around is that I am doing this for ME. I am going to take more time for myself and sit in the jacuzzi when I'm sore, lay by the pool all alone (while the kids are in the childcare!!) and decompress, or take a yoga class and meditate. Another cool thing is I also have a new chiro who is very pro-massage and my insurance pays for chiro office massages. There is a limit but the guy is a friend who is going to hook me up. Heck, even 1 would be great right now. I think I get one paid for every 6 weeks or something, not too shabby. And although I do work at home, I do things that can be worked around usually.

Well I've done a lot of talking about it, and dreading it, and eating over it, and now it is time to make a grocery list and take pictures. Plan of attack for tomorrow....Drop kids off at school and get to gym by 8, hit grocery store on the way home. I only really have 1 option for breakfast tomorrow, I have 1 FF yogurt left, and some cottage cheese. Or a protein shake. I guess thats 2 options huh?? Woo hoo.