I'm not gonna lie, I am STRUGGLING big time. With pretty much everything. I feel like I have mild depression or something. I really can't remember the last time I was in a really good mood. I've been pleased, satisfied, fine, but not more than that. I'm only slightly looking forward to the cruise, mainly becasue what toll it is taking on us financially is barely worth it. I know it will be great, my best vacation ever, but that dosen't pay for plane tickets. I have been totaly off my eating plan, and I skipped my workout yesterday, and I don't feel like going today. I am dressed and going though. I already ate junk for breakfast, so now I feel like poo but I will do better the rest of the day. I have taken into consideration what you guys said about the Ephedra. I do think its part of the problem(had a couple panic attacks last night) but part of it is my life too. I actually a thinking that its not being ON the Ephedra, its taking it one day then not the next, then again the next day. Its too hard on me. I have to make a decision yes or no.
So this is the plan. Yes on the Ephedra,for now, I can deal with it. I need to add caffeine to it(It only has a teeny bit in it) and give myself some freaking energy again. I am also going to look into taking some St. Johns wort, and I will consult my moms health lady on whether I can put all of these things together. Mabye not. But mt sister is taking the SJW and it has helped her a lot. Next partof the plan...I am spending the weekend in Thatcher with my parents and sisters. I have to go because I have traffic court friday afternoon (I don't want to go into detail, lets just say it is VERY VERY stressful)and I've been wanting a getaway for the weekend so Marks keeping the kids all weekend, I'm gonna come home Sunday afternoon. While I am there I am gonna have a PT session with my moms trainer, he trains fitness comp girls and I'd like him to eval. me and mabye shed some light on what I can do to get it together before the cruise. I've seen pics of some of his clients, and he's won awards and such, plus he's super cheap. I need to call him today and set something up there. At least it will get me on track for the week, if I have to meet with this guy I don't want to be all bloated and feeling like ass.
Thats the plansky. I feel so disgusting right now, I want to go hurl my Entemanns up into the toilet right tnow, but I hate to throw up too much. I better drink some water(its been 3 days, but what the hell) and get my self back together.
Minecraft Realms Free Codes
5 years ago
9 comments:
Oh, hon! Hopefully your little kids-free vacation this weekend will give you a bit of a break. Perhaps really focusing on all your internal demons/bad habits is giving you some of this crappiness? There's a reason we deny these things, after all -- and it's not because we LIKE being behind in bills or housework.
I say ditch the Ephedra. It's got a bad rep and you don't need a crutch to get you through. We all want something to give us that boost, but the boosts have side effects and you just don't need that on top of everything else.
If the cruise is stressing you out, can you cancel? If you can't cancel, you might be able to sell your "spot" to someone on Tracker or maybe Jerry Braam has a waiting list of people who didn't get to sign up. I know it would be a great trip...I would love to go myself...but maybe it would be a better trip for you next year when there is no guilt and less pressure attached.
Just my 2 cents....I am certainly a lot like you....LOTS of big plans LOTS of pressure on myself, and LOTS of guilt when I don't follow through on my plans perfectly. Sometimes I just have to let go of the negative energy.
As far as your energy levels go....DON'T buy Entemen's or any other junk that makes you miserable after you eat it...your kids don't even need it. Try to eat enough (I know you tend to not eat much) of the good stuff and you will get your energy back, without supplements.
Do you take a multivitamin with iron though? You could be a little (or a lot) anemic...iron-deficiency anemia can cause an inability to focus and low energy. I would look into that before the SJW.
Hang in there...
I'm so sorry you're feeling down. Little by little I feel myself slipping away too, but I'm trying to catch it before I go all out and really blow it. I hope you can go on the cruise and enjoy yourself. We're just starting to plan one for next year and it is just so expensive to go on a nice vacation. We're starting to plan a year in advance, and hopefully it will all be paid for in cash before it actually comes, then we'll just have the onboard stuff and shore excursions to pay for. I understand how stressful it is though.
Agree 100% with Eileen on the ephedra ...
I'm sure a kid-free weekend and getting the court thing taken care of will go a long way toward putting things back together.
I was wondering about the effect the ephedera was having; could that have something to do with your mood. Maybe the cruise business is just guilt for now. Maybe not the best advice but somehow we always seem to manage & at the end of the day you'll be glad you went regardless of the finances.
Just curious about the trainer, if he's really good why so cheap?
Hi hon sorry you're having a rough go right now.. I hear ya about slipping... Yes I agree the ephedrine could be part of the panic attacks..it can do weird things to ya sometimes-- I know.
Hope you're feelin better soon :D
I understand 100%. I know when I get there I will be excited, but I am not nearly as excited as I should be. It's stressing me for money. No money to buy clothes, no money to do anything while I am there either. I'll just have to hang out by the water.
Lori
I hope you start feeling better soon Janel!
Post a Comment