Random Thoughts

Ohhhhh where to start. Insane saturday is over YAY. Now I will give myself the present of a cleaned up house to wake up to. I had a bit of a struggle with my eating plan the last couple days, its been pretty bad but I am back on track for tomorrow. AF is on the way so will have to wait to weigh in next week. No sense in depressing myself needlessly. My upper body is a little leaner, its really subtle but I can tell a difference and my skinny jeans were fitting SLIGHTLY looser today. My upper body is really coming along well. If I have progress there, I MUST be having some in my lower body too, right? Even if I can't see it as clearly, right? RIGHT???? I was pretty discouraged, especially after the bad couple days I went through, but this afternoon I really could see the quad definition between my quad and hammy today while standing sideways. When did that get there?? Even though the area under my butt seems a little extra dimply lately. OK TMI I know. Boobs shrunk AGAIN.

My big positive right now is after this crazy day and horrible eating, I somehow found the whatever to do my long outdoor run tonight. I put the kids in bed, strapped the silver bullets to my feet, kissed mark bye, and busted out 4 miles in 42 minues. It was a gorgeous night and I felt really energized. My music really gets me through it. I really needed this tonight.

I had a dream the other night that I put on my skinny jeans and i could pull them out from my body about 3 inches all around. It was very real and VIVID! The skin on my stomach and hips was really tight and I was so happy!! This dream has been really helpful in giving me a glimpse at what I want. Its really helping me and making me feel like I can do it, even after bad days like the last 2 I've had. Right now I am still concentrating on a mini-goal that will take me to thanksgiving. Mark will be gone the whole week before thanksgiving, he'll get home that morning so I really want to wow him, and a lot of my family I haven't seen in a while. I HAVE to keep going!!!

I just wanna watch TV

No new story here, just gearing up for another insane weekend. I managed a somewhat lame UBWO, yesterday and the night before the crap hit the fan so I had a sorta-planned free day. I was depressed and I couldn't even take the time to pout because there was way too much crap going on. I'm just glad I amde it back to the gym today, it would have been sooooo easy to skip it! Too bad I'm putting ME first. My consequence for that will be to take 4 of the 5 kiddos to Walmart to do a grocery shopping extravaganza and get 2 b-day gifts for friends parties tomorrow. I', gonna do everything I can to put it off till later if Mark ever gets home from work tonight. Then I can go alone. Even if I should be out at my brothers working!! I did manage to get the car washed and go get halloween costumes for everyone today. 100 bucks later......Oh well they will all get to be what they wanted and have a great time, thats what its all about, right? Their happy memories will long outlast my financial pain (thats what I tell myself) and my kids are CONSTANTLY being told NO, so let them have something, already!! Well, gotta go get them from school... let the circus begin!!!!!

Blah

Who keeps serving the bitchy pops with my 2 o'clock meal??? I'm friggin' T I R E D!!!I guess it dosn't help that I have been literally running my ASS off!!! And I'm on 5 hours sleep, which is FAR too little for me. I may need a cheat meal tonight. Something reasonable like protein pancakes. Ezcept I really don't feel like making them. I'm not even really hungry but I need to snap out of this mood. At least I don't have to run tomorrow, Even though my runners highs lately have been awesome. Have you ever noticed that after a few hours of constant chatter, kids start to sound like chirping birds and its hard to decipher what they are saying?? Yeah, try a few hours of that and see what kind of mood YOUR'E in!!Chirp chirp, chirp chirp CHIRP CHIRP CHIRP CHIRP CHIRP


CHIRPCHIRPCHIRPhalloweenCHIRPCHRIPMOMiwantCHIRPCHIRP
CHIRPIm hungryCHIRPCHIRPMOM!!!CHIRPCHIRPmomlookCHIRP
CHIRPcandyCHIRPCHIRPIwantCHIRP
CHIRPIdon'twanttodomyhomeworkCHIRPCHIRPitsonly14.99CHIRP
CHIRPCHIRPmomlookCHIRPCHIRP
CHIRPihatehomeworkCHIRPCHIRPhalloweenCHIRP
CHIRPhehitmeCHIRPCHIRP
CHIRPCHIRPbookfairCHIRPCHIRPineedlunchmoneyCHIRP
CHIRPschoolcarnivalCHIRPCHIRPCHIRP

oddly this makes me feel better

THE PLAN

Yesterday ended up being good. I can't believe I am halfway thru week2. I almost caved last night- I had to go to my brothers to paint (I know AGAIN with the painting)I'm getting his house ready to sell since his loser x-wife bailed on the job. So about 11:30 pm I took a break and while driving down the street lo and behold SONIC!! BUt I just got a lo-cal diet cherry limeade. I truly didn't see anything worth killing my diet over. That felt GREAT!! My cravings are definetly at a minimum right now. So heres todays plan of attack:

Training schedule:3 mile run (owie)

Meal 1: eggs and oats(done)
2:Protein shake and apple
3:Chicken and broccoli
4: Well, you can pretty much fill in the rest!! LOL

I may get crazy and have some tuna at some point today. Whoa....Someone hold me down I getting out of control!!! LOL LOL

I am very tempted to weigh today at the gym out of curiosity but I will try to resist.


I know you are all wondering what MY special treat form Christie was.... Taaa daaaa!
That is so cute!!! She sits on my computer to motivate me. I love her. I have a wonderwoman t-shirt in my closet I should model it sometime. I never wearit because I was a little too pudgy for it but Mark bought it for me at a comic book store a couple years ago. Hehe she was always my fave.I used to have the Underoos!! LOL

Christie you are such a sweetheart and you are so nice to have thought of me!! I had just finished eating a big batch of 'bitchy pops'(goes well with the Hell diet, huh?) and opening all sorts of BAD mail and getting this little treat was the best surprise!!I'm sure my family thanks you as well, it really lightened my mood! :) You ROCK, sista!!!!